


Ask Me to Live for You

by Daxolotl



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Blood and Violence, F/F, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Knight Alex Danvers, Magic, Near Death Experiences, Princess Kara Danvers, Serious Injuries, Sharing a Bed, Witch Kara Danvers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-21
Updated: 2020-12-21
Packaged: 2021-03-10 22:22:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 7
Words: 12,286
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28204533
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Daxolotl/pseuds/Daxolotl
Summary: Knight Danvers is going to keep the princess of the house of Zor-El safe.Even if it kills her.
Relationships: Alex Danvers/Kara Danvers
Comments: 21
Kudos: 65
Collections: Secret Kalex Santa 2020





	1. Oath

**Author's Note:**

  * For [shrooms](https://archiveofourown.org/users/shrooms/gifts).



> This is my Secret Kalex Santa 2020 gift for _shrooms_ \- I hope you enjoy it as much as I enjoyed writing it!

"-xandra? Alexandra!" The voice is too loud in my ears as I try to open my eyes, squinting into the sun. Too loud, too bright. Oh, this is awful.

I raise my right hand to try and block out the light, and my vision swims and blurs as I look up at it. It feels...wrong. It _looks_ wrong.

I try to focus my gaze, and...oh. I'm missing three fingers. That explains why my hand looks so wrong. I try to curl my hand and watch the remaining fingers move. My thumb curls, but my index finger doesn't seem to want to respond to my commands. And, come to think of it, it doesn't seem like it's meant to have that much blood coming out of it.

Well, that isn't ideal.

I almost laugh at that particular thought, only to start coughing instead. My body is wracked with all the pain I'd been seemingly unaware of. The agony in my hand, the pain in my chest like someone hit it with a hammer (someone...may actually have hit me with a hammer, come to think of it), the cold numbness across my whole left side. I don't remember what happened to me, which is probably a bad sign, and everything about my current condition seems...bad.

I should just...close my eyes again. Rest a while. Just...just a little bit. I'm so...

"Alex!"

That voice.

I force my eyes open, and there she is. Her blonde hair is a mess, and there's dirt on her face, but she's here. She's here, and she looks so beautiful, and she called me _Alex_ , and she's radiant. I almost sob.

"Focus on me, Alexandra. Keep your eyes open, and listen to my voice. You'll be okay; I'll make sure of it. Just stay awake."

I want to. Gods know I want to follow any command she gives me. But the pain is muddying my thoughts, the ringing in my ears is growing louder, and I can feel myself begin to slip into unconsciousness.

How did I get here?


	2. Adjuration

**Three days earlier**

"Knight Danvers!"

The call doesn't distract me from my swordplay. I've fallen for this trick before, and the others have put me on my ass for it. Vasquez especially. Call a name, distract their opponent, earn a cheap victory. Not today.

I feign a glance towards the source of the voice, weakening my stance a little. Vasquez goes to take advantage of it, just like I thought. 

_Training sword, side swing toward the face._

A moment before impact, I smirk.

A single step to the side has them swiping nothing but empty air, and I bring my own blade up before jabbing it twice into their ribs. Another twist of my wrist as I step forwards has the length of the wooden blade smacking into their back as they stumble forwards.

There's a whoop and a holler from the other knights and a grumble from Vasquez as I take an overdramatic bow.

"If you're quite finished showing off, Knight Danvers!"

Oh. Crap.

I look over to the source of the earlier voice. See. That's the downside of ignoring people who are calling your name. Sometimes, they're Captain J'onzz. Sometimes, they're captain J'onzz _escorting the princess to the training grounds._

Oh, _crap!_

I fumble with the sword, trying to work out how to hold it casually, then trying to sheath it in the scabbard that isn't on my hips right now, then settling for just dropping it on to the floor because I should be kneeling right now. I kneel, head bowed. "My Lady."

There's a light giggle from the woman in question and I find myself wishing I'd looked up in time to see it. By the time I raise my head, there's just the echoes of an amused smile on her lips.

J'onn, for his part, doesn't seem particularly amused. His arms are crossed, a stoic look on his face like always. "Come with us, Danvers. The rest of you, keep doing your drills. And Knight Vasquez, I expect you not to overextend next time."

Vasquez mutters a _yes sir_ as they rub their back, and I climb to my feet to follow behind the princess and the captain. I don't ask any questions, and I keep my eyes down. My eyes are drawn to the deep blues of her dress. It's shorter than the usual style of the Krypton court; it doesn't drag across the floor, and it's almost short enough to see her ankles. It would be a scandal if it were anyone other than the princess wearing it.

We step beyond the courtyard, into one of the darkened halls of the great Argo Castle. Even now, my eyes need a moment to adjust, and I blink a few times in the halflight.

As J'onn closes the door behind us, Princess Kara Zor-El turns to face me. Her eyes...oh my god, her eyes. In the darkness, they seem to almost glow. No ordinary mortal has eyes that blue. There's something unnatural about them. Something...

"Magical."

It takes me a few seconds to realise I said that out loud. The princess is looking at me in shock, and J'onn has some alarm or disapproval on his face. Oh, crap. Again.

"I'm sorry, that just...slipped out, I didn't, I mean, I wouldn't, I--"

"It's alright, Alexandra." She rests a hand on my forearm, stilling me into silence with a single gesture. With a single word; a single name. "...That's actually what we need to talk to you about."

Oh no. Have I been looking at her too much? Have I been disrespectful when I've been in her retinue? Has she been uncomfortable around me? Oh, no. "I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable, I can--"

The princess's eyes start to _really_ glow, and as I watch, her feet leave the floor, leaving her levitating in front of me, her hand still resting on my forearm. 

"Holy shit. You're magic."

She's actually, really magic.

I've never even _met_ a mage before. Not knowingly, anyway. I mean, I always thought that Winn might be, but I've never actually...holy shit. A real life mage. How rare are they? My dad told me about the time he worked with one once, and he says...less than one in ten thousand people, or something? I wish I could remember that far back; I wish I could remember what he'd told me. 

The princess quirks her eyebrow at my words, the glow fading as she drops back to the floor, stumbling a little as she lands unevenly on her feet. "Uh...yes? That's what you just said. I thought you'd...you mean you didn't know?"

She looks perplexed, and I kind of want to dig myself a hole in the ground and never leave it. J'onn, for his part, makes another disapproving noise and raises his eyebrows at the two of us. I rub the back of my neck, stepping away from the Princess and averting my gaze.

"Well, uh. Good. Because it's meant to be secret, and it'd be bad if you'd known already." The princess clears her throat and takes a seat at the meeting table. Captain J'onzz stays standing behind her, and I take that as instruction that I should sit down opposite them both. The chair legs squeak a little against the stone floor.

"What do you know about the Tower of Kandor, Knight Danvers?"

The question takes me off guard, and I frown. I wrack my brain to try and remember whatever stories I've heard about it all. "It's, uh...it's a vassal state of Krypton, right?" I really hope that's right.

J'onn opens his mouth to say something, but the princess interjects. "Not exactly. They _do_ call themselves a vassal state, but the truth is more...complicated. The truth is, it's...a mage tower. There are mages from all over the kingdoms who live there. It's a circle of learning." She taps her fingers on the table, an anxious habit of hers I've noticed before. Not that I make a habit of watching her hands or anything."They're more neutral than anything. The only reason they claim to be vassals to us is to make sure that knowledge of them stays secret. If they stood alone, people would question _how_ they stand alone. And if word got out about a city full of mages..."

"...they'd go to war over it." I finish for her. My eyes are wide. My mind's been blown a little, but...it all makes sense. I've never really heard much about Kandor other than it being an obscure city-state. I'd never even questioned it being tied to Krypton or what sort of arrangement we had with them. It just...existed. Quietly.

"Precisely." J'onn speaks up. "The people of Kandor...they're not warriors. They don't want to use their magic to conquer or to fight. They want to _learn,_ and this way...they can. This way the world doesn't tear itself apart to try and get their hands on people the other kingdoms so often see as weapons of war."

I nod. Tangle my fingers together where my hands are resting on the table. Second-guess myself and move them to my lap. Pick at the red-and-blue tabard I'm wearing. "My Lady... Sir... why are you telling me all of this?"

For the first time since I started speaking to her, the princess's face falls. " _Daxam,_ " she says, with all the vitriol you'd expect to hear spoken about our country's oldest enemy.

J'onn rests a hand on the princess's shoulder. "Princess Kara is to travel to Kandor. Her powers manifested only recently, and she needs proper training in their use. She needs to learn about magic. The King and Queen view it solely as a matter of control, but it is also a matter of... growth." He smiles warmly, and I'm filled with the sudden sense of his wisdom. I've known it before when he's looked at me. When holding a sword and training in its use. When handling a quarterstaff. And now, when talking about magic. There's so much I don't know about him, but...the depth of his knowledge is something I'm keenly aware of. Just in glimpses. "But the trouble, as the princess said, is Daxam."

"Trouble on the border, sir?" Military doctrine is what I can stick to here. This is unknown territory. I'm floating without a ship or a paddle; adrift. Staying close to what I know is all I can do.

"Worse: spies." J'onn speaks gravely, and something heavy settles in my gut. Spies? In the capital? "We've intercepted half a dozen messengers, and we know there are far more than that still working in the city. Almost every movement the royal family makes is being watched. Ordinarily, that wouldn't be anything of much concern. But with the princess's upcoming trip to Kandor... it's feared that if the Daxamites discover she's travelled there with her usual convoy, they'll discover the secrets of the city in their pursuit of her. The war we've worked so hard to avoid would arrive by our own hands."

I nod. That really is a fine mess. Daxamite spies, and a city's secret we can't risk revealing. It's... difficult. "So...we send a message to Kandor, asking for a tutor for the Princess?"

J'onn smirks and inclines his head in acknowledgement to the suggestion. "Not quite, I'm afraid. Doubling the number of people performing magic within the castle walls just risks exposure all the same, and any message we send would likely be intercepted. They'd become curious as to why we need a tutor from Kandor." He crosses his arms and gives me an appraising look. I begin to get a sinking feeling in my stomach. "We need to get the princess there quietly. The princess, a single horse, and a single knight to protect her."

Oh, no. The sinking feeling gets a lot stronger, like my legs have been tripped out from under me and I'm about to fall out of the hay loft. "So...I'm going to be acting Captain while you take her to Kandor?" My smile is weak and I can tell it the explanation I'm offering is even weaker.

The Princess, to her credit, laughs at that. I get to see it this time, get to see the brightening of her eyes and the white of her teeth as her lips curl into a wide smile, eyes crinkling at the edges. "I want _you_ to be my escort, Alexandra."

Right.

That explains the sinking feeling.

"M-me, my Lady?"

J'onn answers with a crisp nod. "I have duties here - and spies watching my moves, beyond that. If my routine were to alter, they would surely notice. The princess, on the other hand, routinely goes several days without leaving the castle." The princess grumbles something under her breath and rubs the back of her neck, looking embarrassed about that particular fact. "By the time Daxam's agents notice her absence, the two of you could already be in Kandor."

That explains why it can't be J'onn. It doesn't do a damned thing towards explaining why it has to be _me,_ though.

For a brief, brief moment, I consider saying that. Asking why it has to be me. But I know it's been decided. I know they won't budge. And I'm a knight. I'll do my duty for the royal House of Zor-El. No matter the cost. No matter how confusing it is.

I nod, once. I don't trust my voice right now.

_ _ _

I'd expected to have at least a few days to prepare. But apparently, the world hates me too much for that to be the case. I'd had barely the time to pack supplies and prepare myself before night fell.

No visiting Eliza to say goodbye to her. No telling the other knights about anything - Captain J'onzz says he'll tell them I'm on early patrols at the northern outpost as punishment for offending the princess in some way. They won't notice for a few days. By that time, I'll be far away. I'd be offended by the excuse, but it makes a certain sense. I get visited by the princess, then vanish the next day? They're sure to have questions.

My tabard is resting on the bed, along with my chainmail. My gauntlets, my helmet. My shield. The accoutrements of my career - of my sworn duty to protect the crown - arrayed out to be left behind like nothing. The only thing connected to the city I can keep with me is my pin, adorned with House El's crest. The pin I'd earned the day I became a knight. The princess's aunt had pinned it to my tabard, and I'd never felt prouder. 

Now, it hangs on a chain around my neck. Hidden away, like some secret shame.

Instead of the armour of a guard, I'm adorned in a simple tunic, a dark inky-blue. My sword is resting on my hip, and frankly I'm surprised that J'onn permitted me to take that along. I half expected him to tell me that a travelling girl with a sword would be too suspicious on the road. But he'd allowed it. He hadn't said anything about knives, either, so I have a pair sheathed on my belt and another in my boot. Just in case. But the rest...the rest is staying behind. I sigh, slinging the pack of my supplies on to my back and adjusting its leather straps until it sits right.

How in the Firebird's name did I get tangled up in all this?

There's a knock on my door, just two. It's time. I take one last deep breath before I blow out the last candle and step outside.

J'onn isn't there. Instead, it's just the princess. ( _just_ the princess. Hah.)

It takes me a moment to recognise her. She's wearing clothes almost identical to mine, with a travelling cloak over her shoulders, hood pulled up to cover her face and most of her hair. A single lock of blonde shows itself, but it's her eyes which ultimately give her away as she meets my gaze, looking down towards me. Even behind the thin wireframe glasses she's wearing, they're striking. Her lips curl up into a smile. "Pretty good disguise, right?"

It's the most casual way I've ever heard her speak, and she's never really been one for propriety.

It's all I can do to nod dumbly.

"The captain prepared a horse when he inspected the outer stables earlier today, and apparently he's changed the watch shifts so we'll have five minutes to get through the side gate without anyone stopping us."

There's a small, traitorous part of me that finds this exciting. We're sneaking out in the middle of the night on a secret mission. Knights _dream_ of things like that. Well. Either that, or they dream of saving princesses. 

...I'm kind of doing both, aren't I?

I stamp down on that particular thought. Bad Danvers. "I'll lead you there safely, my lady." I've taken a step past her when she grabs my arm, and wow, okay, her grip is stronger than I was expecting. I pivot to face her, instead. It's either that or fall over, apparently.

"Call me Kara," she says, softly, and for a moment I'm paralysed. The light of the moon is framing her face so wonderfully, and here she is, making such a delicate request. Asking me to call her by her first name, without a title. It feels almost blasphemous. It definitely feels treasonous. "...If anyone overhears us talking on the road we don't want to draw suspicion."

Oh. Right. She's right. That makes sense.

That makes a lot more sense.

"R-right. Of course...Kara."

Her smile seems so full of warmth, so bright, that I can't feel treasonous for saying it. I can only feel like I've said the right thing.

She lets go of my arm, and I miss the feeling the moment she lets go.

There's no guards on the side gate as we approach, just like she said. I watch as the princess slips the captain's key out of her belt pouch, taking a few calming breaths before the lock clicks open. This is it. The moment we go beyond the walls, we're officially out of the realm of the official.There are no records of us leaving. No records of anyone giving either of us permission to go. No records of any of what is about to occur.

It's exhilarating.

It's overwhelming.

It's _terrifying._

I take one step beyond the walls, then another. No bells sound. No one runs out of the undergrowth to ambush us. I let out a breath I didn't realise I'd been holding, and gesture for prin--- for _Kara_ to follow me.

The gate thuds closed, and the key is turned once more.

There's no one at the stables as we arrive, and for a brief moment I wonder J'onn managed it. But the important part is that he did. Sure enough, one of the horses is saddled up and ready to go, saddlebags next to him. He's not my favourite horse. Maybe J'onn didn't want to part with Sweep. Or maybe his absence would've been noticed just like J'onn's.

Funny, to think that I might be more easily disappeared than a horse.

I strap the bags in place and grip the saddle before mounting the horse in a single fluid motion. He whinnies a little and blows out a huff of vaguely annoyed air at the disturbance, and I pat his neck until he settles down.

I raise my head to look towards the princess, and I completely freeze for a few seconds as I watch her tug her hood down in the relative cover of the stables.

My mouth falls open.

Where when I'd seen her hours before (and every time before that), she'd had long flowing locks of golden hair, now it's...short.

Short like someone took a knife to it and just hacked away.

It's messy, and looks like something she might have even done herself. Just leaned over a basin and started hacking away. It's the sort of thing _I'd_ do, if I decided to cut my hair. Scratch that, it's the sort of thing I _have_ done when I decided to cut my hair. 

And somehow, it looks a lot better on her than I've ever managed to make it look. She looks...

I clear my throat, and hold my hand out towards the princess.

She seems to just stare at me for a brief moment; at my outstretched hand. There's something I can't place in her eyes.

Then she smiles, bright as the sun, and takes my hand.

I pull her up on to the horse, letting her settle behind me. Her hands wrap around my waist, and we set off into the night.


	3. Pledge

My eyes are beginning to grow heavy when Kara next speaks up.

"What do you think his name is?"

...What? "What?"

"The horse! What do you think his name is?"

In terms of my priorities, that one hadn't exactly been one of my highest at the moment. "In terms of my priorities, that one hadn't exactly been one of my highest."

Kara snorts. "So professional, Alexandra."

I take a slow breath at the sound of my voice coming from her. I'm so used to hearing _Knight Danvers_. I fought so hard to be a knight, and...I've always been Alex, not Alexandra. But hearing my first name from _royalty_ is something else. It changes things.

"So you don't know his name?"

I grit my teeth, trying to focus myself in the moment. The horse has been drifting left, and I tug at the reins a little to guide him back on track. "No. I don't. I've never ridden him before."

Kara hums and pats one of his haunches. He huffs again. "...I think we should call him Streaky."

I can't help the bark of laughter that escapes my mouth, the sound echoing through the night. "Streaky?! What, is he a cat?"

Kara makes an affronted noise. "It's a good name! He has streaky socks on his legs, and it suits him, and that's his name now!"

I groan and rub my eyes. "We're not calling the horse Streaky, Kara."

"We will. Just you wait."

She sounds far too smugly confident about that, and I sigh. Damn it, she's going to be right, isn't she? "I'm going to call him Gertrude just to spite you."

Kara giggles, and her arms tighten around my waist a little.

All at once, everything strikes home again. I'm not talking with a friend here. I'm not hanging out with the other squires in the barracks. I'm not on patrol with Vasquez, or having drinks with Winn. I'm escorting the princess of Krypton.

I take a breath, and intentionally straighten my shoulders. This is work, and I'm going to treat it like work.

"Do you know how far we'll go tonight?"

I look up at the moon, high in the sky. By my estimate, it's probably about midnight. Maybe one in the morning. "Another hour, then we'll make camp. We'll have a late start tomorrow, but...getting this progress the first night was important." I pull the map out of my satchel, squinting at it in the light of the moon. I'm barely able to make out any details, and I can't read any names. "But we'll need to travel by day after this. We need to see the landmarks and the signs, and...we'd draw more attention moving at night if anyone spotted us."

Kara hums her agreement. "You've never travelled the roads to Kandor before?"

I try my hardest to ignore the feeling of her words breathed against the back of my neck. So, instead, I shake my head. "Never." 

"Then this will be a new journey for the both of us."

Her hand settles next to my sword blade, and I let out a slow breath. Another hour, and we'll make camp. Once we're just travellers in the daylight, it'll be easier. It's just nerves about this subterfuge-in-darkness that are making me tense every time her arms shift or she speaks against the back of my neck.

If I keep telling myself that, maybe I'll believe it. 

I doubt it, though.

_ _ _

She doesn't complain about making camp in the woods around Krypton. Not the first night.

For some reason, that doesn't really surprise me. I've grown up seeing her wearing expensive dresses and being part and parcel with Kryptonian high society, but she never came across as... _stifled_ by it.

Is that the word?

I dunno.

But she's always just been Princess Kara. Friendly, and bright, and excited just to be here and to be speaking to whoever it is she's meeting with. Excited to learn.

She offers to guide the horse ("I'm not calling it Streaky, Kara.") the second day, and, with some reluctance, I let her. She convinces me by saying that if someone attacks us, I can jump off to fight and she can stay on horseback.

Really, I think she just wanted a chance to take the reins for the day. But I'm not going to complain, especially not when it lets me keep my eyes on the map and on our surroundings, and when it means I can get a little more distance from her. I don't need to wrap my arms around her to stay steady.

She doesn't complain the second night, either.

Well. She complains about our bedrolls being five feet apart, but other than that? Not a peep.

I still can't believe she suggested having the bedrolls closer together. Even if it was just for warmth, it's...untoward.

I'm the one in front again the next day, guiding the horse. He's a sturdy mount, able to handle both of our weights along with the saddlebags. Then again, he was trained to handle men in armour. A pair of women with one sword between them? We're probably a lot lighter than J'onn is when he's in full battle wear.

Kara's chewing on an apple and examining the map, turning it upside down and humming as she tries to compare the waymarks to the real life geography around us.

I can't help but grin over my shoulder at her. "I didn't take you for a cartographer."

She makes a happy noise around her bite of apple, pointing out the hill to our northeast, then to the map. She smears a bit of apple juice on the vellum, and I find myself wondering how someone could be raised as royalty and still be such a messy (and voracious) eater. "I love maps. I don't get to leave the kingdom often, so maps are...an escape, I guess?" She shrugs, offering up the information freely. Her legs sway and dangle with every step the horse takes. "And I love how they translate information about the world into this...flat, interpretive form. I can look at that hill over there, and I can know that the little bump drawn on this map is meant to represent that same hill."

I glance back at the map, then take it and turn it 90 degrees to the right before handing it back. "Wrong hill."

Kara's nose wrinkles adorably (no, bad Danvers) and she gets a little crinkle between her eyebrows. "Wait, really?" She looks between the map and the hill, then back again, then back again. "That hill doesn't look anything _like_ it does on the map!"

I burst out laughing. I can't help it.

Kara starts pouting, and I feel a little bad about it, but it just makes me laugh harder.

She goes back to the map, looking much grumpier than before, and tosses the apple core over her shoulder. She doesn't speak up again until my laughter _finally_ dies down.

"Hey, Alexandra? There's an inn marked on the map a few miles ahead of us. If we stop a little early for the night, we could stay there rather than camping out again."

I make an uncertain noise. An inn, only a little over two days' ride from Krypton? That feels like a risk.

"If we stop there, we can stock up on food. Weren't you saying last night about how with the distance we've still got left and our supplies, you'd need to hunt on the way, and that any time you need to hunt we'd lose a day?"

Damn it. Throwing my own words back at me? That's low, even for a princess. Reluctantly, I let out a sigh and nod. "Fine. But we have to be careful, okay?"

I can _feel_ Kara rolling her eyes even though I'm not looking at her. "Yes, _mom._ I know how to blend in, y'know. Don't talk to strangers, don't wear the hood indoors because it just makes me more suspicious-looking, don't ask too many questions, don't flash around any more money than I need to pay for things..."

I tug on the reins to guide Str--- _the horse_ back on track as he gets distracted by some sort of particularly strange looking mushroom at the side of the road. "Sneak out of the city all the time, do you?" I can't resist the jibe, a smirk in my voice. "I didn't know you were so worldly, my lady."

Kara pokes my shoulder with her finger.

"Ow. The pain."

"First, don't call me that." She says. I roll my eyes. There's no one out here but us, and anyone who did hear it (if anyone had been around, _which they aren't_ ) would just think it was a joke. "Second...no. I don't sneak out of the city often. But J'onn taught me a lot. He worries."

"Like a mother hen," I say, then immediately feel bad about it. Sorry, Captain.

"Exactly!" Kara laughs, bright and happy. "He frets so much. Gods, I thought it was just me he did that for. You, too?"

I shrug, and the horse responds to the motion on the reins with a disapproving flick of his ears. "I think he does it for all the guards, really. Maybe me a little more; he and my father were friends. He's looked out for me ever since..."

Kara's arm wraps around my waist and she squeezes, just a little. "I'm glad you had someone."

"Me, too."

We ride in silence the rest of the way to the inn.


	4. Bond

Letting Kara out of my sight hadn't particularly been something I'd wanted to do. But she could be very convincing when she wanted to be, and she _did_ have a point that it'd be more suspicious for us to stick together the whole time instead of splitting up. 

Still. I try to keep half an eye on her as she approaches the innkeep to arrange our room and board at the _Lane Less Travelled_. I'm bartering with the local hunter for a couple of rabbits. She keeps trying to upsell the jackalope she's got, and my attention is slowly getting more and more drawn into the conversation.

"I'm telling you, they taste more like venison than rabbit!" 

I roll my eyes exaggeratedly. "And I'm telling _you_ that I wasn't born yesterday. Jackalopes are all gristle and antler! You're asking for twice the price for a meat that takes a whole day of stewing just to be edible."

The hunter crosses her arms, smirking. "Well, it's very popular with the locals. But I suppose if your palette isn't refined enough to appreciate the flavour..."

My mouth falls open in disbelief. What kind of con is this woman trying to pull?! "Excuse me? My palette? I'm not sure how some two-bit small-town--" Kara's arms wrap around me from behind and I freeze. Still as a statue. My eyes widen, and my words cut off.

"Alexandra, stop fighting the local huntress before I get jealous." She murmurs, resting her chin on my shoulder.

I make a vague strangled noise, and the hunter seems to take that as a victory. She lets out a cackle. "Listen to your girl there, lady. So, two rabbits and a jackalope?" She holds out the tiny antlered thing by the neck and wiggles it between her fingers to demonstrate.

"...Fine." I start counting out coins to pay for our (ludicrously overpriced) food, and do my best to ignore Kara's arms around my waist. What is she _doing?_

As the last coin is handed over and the last rabbit is exchanged, the hunter gives us both a grin. "Quite the lady you've got yourself here, blondie."

Kara giggles and her arms tighten around my waist, cutting me off as I was about to say something to disagree. She guides us into turning around, walking towards the lodgings. Just as I think we're safe, Kara calls out. "I keep her in line well enough."

The hunter's laughter just gets louder, and I blush a deep scarlet red.

The moment the door to our room is closed behind her, I break out of her embrace and turn to face Kara with an incredulous look. "What the hell was that?!" I hiss, wary of raising my voice.

She raises her hands, placating. "Okay. I'm sorry, I should've warned you. But hear me out, okay?"

"Hear you out?! I am your _escort._ Nothing more, nothing less. I am with you to keep you safe, and that is what I'm going to do. I'm not--we're not..." We could never be.

Kara can't meet my eyes. Or won't.

After a few seconds, she nods. 

"You're right." She looks up at me, and I'm shocked at how cold she looks. "And as my _escort,_ it's your _job_ to keep me safe, yes?"

I take a staggered step back.

"As my _escort,_ it's your job to make sure we don't draw attention to ourselves, as two women who are on the road together without anyone else alongside us, heading for unknown pastures, and to support whatever cover makes us least conspicuous for that." She takes a step forwards and jabs my chest. "Look at our _room,_ Alexandra."

With a sinking clarity, I turn my head to look at the room she'd brought us to. Sure enough, it's got a tiny double bed, and nothing else.

"Because _as my escort,_ I figured you wouldn't want us to have separate rooms." She jabs my chest. "Because I thought for one night you might be able to suck it up and sleep next to a girl like me and pretend we're something we're not, _to do your damn job."_

Well. Now I feel like an asshole.

"Now, if that explanation is _acceptable_ to you, Knight Danvers," She yanks the door open roughly. "I'm going to get washed up."

She steps out and slams the door behind her before I have a chance to answer.

I sway on my feet a little.

I'm officially the dumbest bodyguard in the kingdoms.

I hang the rabbits up on autopilot. Sort through our bags to check our supply situation. Peek out of the window of the room to check for anyone on the roads who might be following us. Tug off my travelling clothes down to the undershirt, and check to make sure my blade is still sharp.

And then I'm left alone, for the first time in days.

Nothing but me, my thoughts, and an overpriced dead jackalope which is staring at me.

"What are you looking at?" I say to the disapproving meal. It doesn't respond.

Of course it doesn't. It's judging me as harshly as I'm judging myself. I make a rude gesture at it and, resigned, climb into the bed. Shifting across it to the far side, back against the wall. It's lumpy and uncomfortable, but it's still a lot better than camping out. Now the discomfort is emotional rather than physical.

The door creaks open, and I watch in silence as Kara pads her way back into the room. Her nightshirt is too nice for a normal person. I suppose there are things she's struggled to give up, even if she's taken most of our journey in stride. She doesn't mind the muddy boots or the rough woolen clothes or the long days of riding. But apparently, sleep is one of the comforts she still allows herself.

"I'm sorry," I say, quiet and half-muffled by the bedsheets. She looks over at me in surprise, eyes widening. "...I was being an idiot."

The princess pauses then offers a half shrug. "A little bit, yeah. But I mean...I get it. I caught you off guard. I shouldn't have... " She scuffs her foot against the floor as she blows out the candle lighting the room. "... I shouldn't have taken it as a rejection."

A rejection? What? What would I be rejecting, why would-- 

My train of thoughts leading towards an understanding of whatever Kara just said is abruptly derailed by her climbing into the bed. Immediately it becomes apparent that calling this a 'double bed' was the owners upselling this room just as much as the hunter upsold the jackalope. She ends up pressed against me, her face just inches from my own, and we both freeze.

"Sorry," we both say, at the same moment.

I roll over to try and afford her a little more space, even if it does mean my face ends up practically squished against the wall.

Her arms wrap around me, in the same way they did earlier, and she pulls me a little further from the edge. A little closer to her. "We'll make space enough for both of us. You'll catch a chill pressed against the wall like that."

I shiver against her touch and her words, squeezing my eyes closed. "I like women," I manage to croak out, in the stifling dark. A confession of the truth I've been terrified of the princess learning.

"I know," she says, simply.

I blink. "You...know?"

"Yep. I mean, I always kind of thought..." Kara trails off, then seems to decide to start her sentence somewhere else. "Knight Sawyer's in the royal retinue. Word gets around, even amongst royalty."

Well.

Crap.

Good to know _that_ whole episode of my life is gossip even amongst the royal family. That just fills me with confidence. Good to know they all know I'm an aberration. The fact that they ever trusted me around Princess Kara is surprising enough. The fact that I was chosen for this role...

_Just another reason why I'm the wrong choice for this._

"You're not the wrong choice."

It takes me a moment to realise she replied to what I'd been thinking.

It takes me another moment to realise I probably said what I'd been thinking out loud.

Crap. My cheeks flush, embarrassment creeping through me at my own carelessness.

"You're not."

There's sheer conviction in her words. Sheer will. It's almost intimidating, and I'm a woman who views the captain of the guard as a father figure. Intimidating isn't really something that I've noticed very often. She's just...so convinced of it. I can't help but ask the question that's been weighing on my mind since they asked me to do this. Since they chose me. "Why me?"

Kara shrugs against me. "I have a good feeling about you."

A good feeling.

A good feeling. Can that...can that seriously be it? Is that everything??

The princess sees me, and gets a _good feeling,_ and here I am?

"No. There's more to it than that. I mean... " Kara lets out a sigh against the back of my neck, and her fingers play with the fabric of my undershirt. "You're strong, and you're fast, and you're dedicated, sure. But from what J'onn's told me, he's got a dozen other knights who could serve as well for that. But you..."

I wait, in suffocating silence.

"You smile when I talk to you."

Okay. That wasn't what I was expecting to hear. "What?"

Kara gently encourages me to roll over, tugging at my arm until I obey. Her eyes are brilliant in the darkness, their radiance clear. She smiles at me, so softly, and moves to rest a hand on my cheek. 

I forget how to breathe.

"Whenever you were on duty, guarding me? I'd...notice you. The way you smile whenever I'm talking, like being near me isn't just _duty_ for you," she says. "The way you'd fumble over your words around me and try not to look at me when I spoke to you... and the way you'd look at me right after I got distracted by something else. I know that anyone I picked would be strong, and fast, and brave. But I knew that if I picked you... I'd be _safe."_

My mouth opens and closes a few times, but I don't say anything. Kara's fingers trail over my cheek, down to my jaw.

"I know that all the knights are sworn to protect the royal family; they all tell me they'd die for this kingdom. But when I look at you...I _know_ you'd do anything to keep me safe. I can feel it, in a way that I don't know how to explain. I _trust_ you."

Her hand rests on the back of my neck, and she leans forwards. I need to say something. 

I need to say anything.

"I forgot to brush my teeth," I blurt out.

Kara blinks at me, freezing in place.

Great work, Danvers. Amazing job.

I take the opportunity of her being distracted by my extremely unsexy words to climb over her and practically run to the door, almost blind in the dark. I step around the saddlebags blindly, knowing they're there in the pitch blackness, and tug the door open.

There's a basin of water in the communal bathing area. I splash some in my face, gasping at the cold which bites at my hands and my cheeks.

I grip the edges of the basin, and I just...breathe.

_Just breathe, Danvers. It's fine._

_You're a knight of House Zor-El, you can handle anything._

Does that anything include the daughter of House Zor-El?

I resist the urge to smack myself at that particular thought. 

_No. Absolutely not. Stop it. She's your charge. Take her to Kandor, and do your damn job. Stop getting distracted._

_It's not like you can offer her anything, anyway._

My inner critic is right, as always. I'm a knight. She's royalty. I can't offer her anything except my service.

I bite my lip.

Damn it! No! Not like that. Service as a knight. Duty. Loyalty. Fealty. All those words ending in Y. Not in...other ways. Other, really fun ways...

I splash myself with water again.

By the time I get back to the room, Kara looks like she's asleep - at least from what I can see from the crack of light through the door as I slip inside.

I try to walk as quietly as I can back to the bed. A floorboard creaks halfway there, and I freeze for a moment to make sure everything's okay. After a few moments, content that she won't wake up, I step closer. She's left my space by the wall. Considerate, except for the fact that I need to climb over her to get back there.

I rest my hand next to her head, and start trying to climb my way over her without disturbing her.

I make it halfway across, hovering directly above her, when Kara's eyes open. Her lips curve into a grin, and I feel like I'm the one trapped beneath her.

She reaches up, towards my neck...but her fingers brush the chain around my neck instead. She tugs at it, revealing the pendant hidden beneath my shirt. Holding her own family's crest between her fingers.

"I trust you, Alexandra," is all she says. Then she pulls me down, the chain tangling in her fingers as she kisses me.

The world doesn't end.

J'onn doesn't burst through the door to tell me that my services are no longer required. The king and queen don't step through the door to accuse me of witchcraft and seduction.

(That sounds more like Kara's deal, anyway.)

It's just...Kara. Her lips are soft, and gentle, and tentative. She's warm, and close, and I can feel the way her nails rock along each link in the chain around my neck, slow and rhythmic. She's...peaceful.

I reach my hand across to stroke over her cheek, and I kiss her again. Because I want to. Because she deserves it. Because she lets me.

She giggles against my lips, tugging on the chain a little. "In case it wasn't obvious? I like women, too."

I laugh and kiss her a third time, then a fourth.

Sleep can wait.


	5. Affirmation

We wake up later than normal the next day.

There's a crispness to the air, despite the late start. The weather's getting colder, more autumnal, and there's signs of barely-melted frost. My breath comes out in puffs of white mist, curling in the air as I sit atop the horse.

Kara's taking a moment to feed him another apple. "There we go, there's a good boy, Streaky!" She scritches his nose, and I roll my eyes. Then she looks at me with that smile on her face, and that brightness in her eyes, and with her cheeks and her nose flushed red from the cold and her hood pulled up to keep out the cold. And I kind of forget what I was rolling my eyes about.

I hold my hand out towards her, because what else am I meant to do. She takes it, and settles on the horse behind me.

I click my tongue and encourage the horse forwards as Kara presses a kiss to my cheek, and I try not to be blushing too obviously as we begin to trek away from the _Lane Less Travelled._ As we crest the hill, we pass by the hunter from last night, snares in her arms and a bow across her back. I keep half a suspicious eye on her, but all she does is wave at Kara and make a rude gesture at me.

I make a gesture of my own right back, and Kara laughs. "You _really_ didn't like her, did you?"

"She was cocky. It was annoying."

Kara wraps her arms around my waist, settling in for the day's ride, and I let ~~Streaky~~ _the horse_ pick our pace. We're in no hurry today.

We ride in silence for a while.

We pass by the road to Mount Sundaresh, and the site of the Battle of Rao's Field. We pass through a Martian settlement, and Kara makes delighted conversation with one of the tiny green children as we pass through. She gives one our jackalope, and I almost, almost complain about that. But the child looks so happy about it, and so does Kara. I can't find it in me to be annoyed. Besides, they'll be able to cook it better than we can on the road.

"I didn't know you spoke Martian," I note, glancing over my shoulder at her.

"The winter will be hard here," Kara says in lieu of answering, as we pass beyond the outskirts of the town. "I just...wanted to help a little. In whatever way I can."

I can tell she has more to say, and I don't pry. I just guide the horse into a trot, picking up the pace a little. The sun is already high in the sky. We might not be in a rush, but that doesn't mean I want to be out on Rao's Field tonight. There's not enough trees here; it's all open plains and gentle rolling hills. But if we can get through to Wegthor Forest we'll have plenty of cover to make camp in.

"I learnt Martian when I heard that there were refugees arriving in our borders. I was eight, and I just...I couldn't bear imagining that these people would be arriving here alone, in a place where so few speak their language. I still can't bear it, really."

I smile, soft and encouraging. She's so _kind._ I've always known it, always seen it when I've escorted her, but...hearing it now, hearing that it's the case outside of meeting halls and outside of her Duties to the country, it...it makes me care about her even more.

"I wanted to help them, and I still do. I know things are complicated and there's always so many people in need but..." Kara sighs. "Y'know, that's actually why I want to go to Kandor."

_That's_ a surprise. "It is?" I ask, and I feel her nod against my back. "I thought you just wanted to...I dunno, learn how to use these abilities. I'd be scared I'd blow up something by accident."

"Oh, trust me, I'm terrified about that part." Kara laughs it off, but I can hear the genuine fear in her voice. "Sure, I want to go to learn. I don't want to hurt anyone or anything, and Kandor will be good for that. But..."

I stay quiet, looking out across the fields as we crest a hill. The field is clear, and I see a handful of sheep out in the old battleground. There's traces of a campfire out on the plains, too, just the wisps of smoke left behind from some other traveller who moved on hours ago. I check the horizon for any sign of them, just in case. It doesn't hurt to be too careful, y'know?

"But I've got this _power_ in me. This blessing." Kara's hands tangle themselves in my tunic. "And as terrifying as it is, I can't help but think of all the _good_ I could do with it with the right training. The other nations might hate me for being a royal mage, but...I'll be able to help people in ways I can't even imagine yet."

I beam, turning on the horse to kiss the top of her head. It's all I can do, and kissing her lips is a bit tricky with the angles right now. There's a crick in my neck just doing that much, and the horse drifts to one side before I correct his path. "You'll do great, Kara. I know you will. You'll _be_ great."

Kara leans in to kiss my cheek. "Of course I will," she says. "I'll have you by my side."

I can feel the blush flooding my cheeks and I clear my throat a couple of times. I grab a waterskin from one of the saddlebags, just as an excuse for that. Just a scratchy throat. I'm definitely not embarrassed.

"You're so cute."

Okay. Maybe I'm a little embarrassed.

_ _ _

We almost make it to the cover of Wegthor Forest when we see them.

Five men, stepping out from the shade.

Shit.

I tug on the reins, pulling the horse to a halt as my eyes flick between them all.

They don't look like Daxamite troops; more like bandits. But then again, spies from Daxam probably wouldn't.

The ringleader doesn't have any weapons, but the rest of all do. One's resting a mace on his shoulder, another has a crossbow dangling from their fingertips. The leader in question raises a hand to wave at us. "Ho there!" he calls, a grin on his face.

I rest my hand on my sword's pommel, making sure to keep Kara behind me. "Afternoon."

"May I ask where two young women such as yourselves are travelling to? These are dangerous times, after all."

'Dangerous times' my left foot. It's peacetime. The only ones who want it to _not_ be peacetime are the Daxamites. And they just aren't brave enough to fight directly after the trouncing we gave them twenty years ago. "Just passing through. We're going home to visit my family."

The ringleader crosses his arms, humming. "See, let's presume we're telling the truth about your destination. I don't think it's up to you decide about whether you're passing through or not."

Okay.

Screw this guy.

"Can we skip the formalities? So is this a _bridge toll_ kinda deal, or more of a _take any coins we've got off our dead bodies_ situation?" I ask, loudly, making sure to sound as unbothered and unimpressed as I feel by this guy's menacing talk.

The main feigns shock, and wow, he looks pretentious doing that. "Oh, no. You misunderstand! We're law-abiding citizens of Krypton, you see, not bandits. My name's Maxwell, and this is a local militia I managed to group together. Say hello, folks, be polite."

They offer a variety of grunted greetings and half-waves. None of them are more than monosyllabic, and I'm not really surprised by that. Still, my grip on the pommel of my sword tightens.

"You see, I heard from some friends of mine in the capital that the princess of Krypton has gone missing." He tilts his head, trying to get a better look at Kara. I shift my shoulder to keep her behind me, even as the tension in my body grows taut. "Possibly kidnapped - by one of her own bodyguards, no less. Would you know anything about that, Knight Danvers?"

Yep.

We're screwed.

Officially.

"My name's Grey, and I'm no knight. I hadn't heard about the princess though; I was there just a few days ago and hadn't heard any news about a disappearance. That's terrible."

Maxwell smirks. He raises a hand.

We don't have much time. I need to get Kara away from this all. I hiss instructions to her, talking too quietly for Maxwell or his goons to hear from this distance. "Get out of here. Take Streaky and ride, fast as you can, back to the Martians." I hear her starting to say something in argument, but I interrupt. "Damn it, Kara. This is my job, and we need a distraction here. I'll be fine."

I hope she'll forgive me for that particular lie.

The goon with the crossbow is aiming it at me, and I dismount from the horse. His aim follows me. "But I'm impressed you heard about that so fast. Your friends in the city must be very keen to share news across the kingdom."

Maxwell laughs and rubs his cheek. "You know, you were absolutely right, earlier." His laughter stops; his face falls. "We really _should_ skip the formalities."

What happens next happens in slow motion.

I slap the haunch of Streaky, hoping that'll be enouch incentive to start him moving.

I sidestep, twisting my body to the side.

The archer's finger twitches, loosing a bolt towards where I'd just been.

And the other three goons rush towards me.

I see everything. A mace. A sword and shield. An axe. My hand tightening on my sword's grip. The sweat dripping down the axeman's neck. The way Kara's cloak billows as Streaky starts running. 

The way she's staring at me, a heartbroken look on her face.

After that, everything happens all at once.


	6. Testimony

_Mace swinging down._

I block with my sword. Draw my dagger, driving it towards their gut. He sidesteps, and the blade barely grazes him.

_Sword, on the left._

Break away from the parry, dodge the sword swing, then the next. Toss the dagger underarm, draw their attention. He blocks it with his shield, and I punish him for it.

Drive forwards, swing high. He parries. Twist the blade, step past him. Drive my second dagger into his shoulder.

He yelps and staggers forwards, his sword arm immobilised.

Sword to the neck to finish him off.

_Axe._

I duck, my finishing blow interrupted, As an axe swings over my head.

_Mace._

I jerk upright and the mace barely misses my nose. My balance is thrown off, and fight back the dizziness.

_Shield._

Wait, what? 

The shield of the injured man strikes me in the face and I stagger backwards, ears ringing and vision blurring. 

_Axe from the left, sideways. Downwards swing from the mace._

I dart back another pace, and both swings fall short of my new position.

My one advantage here is that they're easy to predict. Rough training, nothing more.

_Crossbow!_

Fuck!

I charge forwards, towards the axe-wielder, and _feel_ the crossbow bolt fly past my shoulder. He blocks my swing by raising his axe overhead.

_Mace, behind you._

Perfect.

I tug my sword downwards and around, leaving a gouge across the haft of the axe as I spin, stabbing my blade forwards.

The blade drives cleanly through the upper chest of the man who'd been swinging a mace at my head. It catches on the bone, but the resistance is less than I'd have expected.

He makes some sort of choked gurgling noise, and--

_Shield charge._

I let go of the sword, knowing I don't have the time to pull it free, and the injured militia member lets out a battlecry as he charges me down with his shield.

The force of it does more than knock the wind out of me. I feel one of my ribs crack as he crashes into my chest, knocking me to the floor and pinning me beneath him.

Ow. There's a spike of red and pain in my vision as he keeps pressure on the shield, holding me against the floor. The dagger I'd tossed into it has been snapped off or yanked out; either way, it's not useful.

"Get over here and kill this girl already!"

I see the man with the axe readying himself to take a swing at me.

Well. That's not going to be a nice way to go.

_Dagger._

I yank the dagger out of the shoulder, and he has just enough time to yell in pain before I jam it into his throat and _twist._

Blood sprays over my face and I roll his body off me just in time to roll with him and dodge the axe swing.

Take the shield from the dead man's hands, twisting to my feet and drawing my last knife from my boot.

I'm out of breath and I've got a broken rib, but I've got a shield now. Small victories. One step at a time, y'know?

The axeman is looking at me with a level of wariness.

_Crossbow._

I raise my shield, ducking my head behind it for a second as the bolt strikes the wood. 

I raise my head just in time to see the axe swinging for me, towards my shield arm.

Right. Raw force. That's an issue.

I can't make enough space between us fast enough. It's going to hit me. If it hits me, in the best-case scenario my arm breaks. In the worst-case scenario, it cuts through the wood and cuts my whole arm off.

_Charge._

Rush forwards, turning my shield towards the blow. 

What strikes the shield is the wooden haft of the axe, not the blade. Raise my knife to try and stab the axe's owner.

He sidesteps almost lazily, and I stagger past him. He swings at me again, and I barely dodge away from it. Another swing, then another. I'm wheezing now, my stance dipping lower.

_Crossbow._

__

__

_Axe._

I can't twist the shield between me and the archer fast enough. The angles are all wrong, and I'm too slow. I realised they'd reloaded too late.

There's a screaming pain in my leg, and I feel it totally give from under me, like the whole thing just decided to stop working.

The axe swing is still coming, and it's all I can do to raise the shield to block it.

Sure enough, the shield splits and shatters - and most of the bones in my left arm go the same way.

Another searing, blinding pain.

My mouth opens and closes a few times, but no noise comes out. My leg has stopped working, and I don't particularly want to look at the damage the crossbow did to it. My left arm is twisted the wrong way, and I'm pretty sure that's a bone jutting out.

Despite the pain (and trust me, there's a _lot_ of pain right now), I feel oddly...separated from it. Like I'm watching myself go through the whole experience.

Kara should be back in the Martian camp right now. With any luck, they won't have any spies amongst them, and she'll get a message back to the capital. She'll be okay. Someone else will get her to Kandor. Maybe they really will say it was a kidnapping.

_Axe._

I force myself upwards, with my one working leg and my one working arm. I grip the knife in my hands tightly, and drive it forwards with all the malice I can muster. It strikes the axeman in his abdomen before I collapse back to my knees.

The man with the axe is calling me some things.

I think they're rude, but my ears are buzzing too much for me to really know what he's saying. He's injured, but he's still going. I didn't stop him.

_Axe._

I raise my arm in petty defiance, and I feel the blade cut into my hand.

I finally let myself scream, the noise coming out hoarse and broken as I clutch my hand to my chest.

She's okay. She's okay. She's going to be okay.

I squeeze my eyes closed, willing the end to come.

I did my duty.

_I did my duty._

_Axe._

"ALEX!"

My eyes blink open.

Kara?

_No._

No, she shouldn't be here, she should be--

"Kara, run!" I try to yell, but I can barely speak any more. I look towards the source of her voice, wide-eyed and desperate, as she crests the hill.

And....

Oh, fuck.

She's on foot. Her travelling cloak billows outwards. Her eyes are glowing. And there is pure _power_ flowing out of her.

She claps her hands, and the man in front of me is blasted off his feet, blown back by a wave of force.

The glow of her eyes grows more intense, and a beam of light and heat sears its way across the treeline where the archer had been standing.

I laugh, delirious... and finally let myself collapse.

She's safe.

She's safe, she's safe, she's safe.

_ _ _

"-xandra? Alexandra!" The voice is too loud in my ears as I try to open my eyes, squinting into the sun. Too loud, too bright. Oh, this is awful.

I raise my right hand to try and block out the light, and my vision swims and blurs as I look up at it. It feels...wrong. It _looks_ wrong.

I try to focus my gaze, and...oh. I'm missing three fingers. That explains why my hand looks so wrong. I try to curl my hand and watch the remaining fingers move. My thumb curls, but my index finger doesn't seem to want to respond to my commands. And, come to think of it, it doesn't seem like it's meant to have that much blood coming out of it.

Well, that isn't ideal.

I almost laugh at that particular thought, only to start coughing instead. My body is wracked with all the pain I'd been seemingly unaware of. The agony in my hand, the pain in my chest like someone hit it with a hammer (someone...may actually have hit me with a hammer, come to think of it), the cold numbness across my whole left side. I don't remember what happened to me, which is probably a bad sign, and everything about my current condition seems...bad.

I should just...close my eyes again. Rest a while. Just...just a little bit. I'm so...

"Alex!"

That voice.

I force my eyes open, and there she is. Her blonde hair is a mess, and there's dirt on her face, but she's here. She's here, and she looks so beautiful, and she called me _Alex_ , and she's radiant. I almost sob.

"Focus on me, Alexandra. Keep your eyes open, and listen to my voice. You'll be okay; I'll make sure of it. Just stay awake."

I want to. Gods know I want to follow any command she gives me. But the pain is muddying my thoughts, the ringing in my ears is growing louder, and I can feel myself begin to slip into unconsciousness.

How did I get here?


	7. Vow

**Three days later**

A few things run through my mind.

First of all, I'm still alive. 

So. That's a surprise.

Second of all, I'm in a bed. I think I am, anyway. It feels softer than the bed Kara and I had shared at the _Lane Less Travelled._

Third, and honestly more surprising than the lack of my own deadness is...the lack of any real pain. I've got a bit of a headache, sure, and my left arm feels a bit stiff, but...

I open my eyes.

I'm in...a room.

_Very descriptive, Knight Danvers._

It seems...rustic. Is that the right word? There are exposed beams on the roof, and it's...small. I raise my head to try and take in any other details in the room that I can make out, and the movement catches the attention of...a Martian woman.

A sudden tension rolls through me. Where is Kara?

"You're awake! I imagine you must be confused, and have a lot of questions, but--"

"Where's Kara?" I interrupt her.

She pauses. "Or just the one. Alright." She grins, head tilting a little, and offers a quick nod. "I'll go and get her for you, okay?"

I nod unsteadily, and watch as she walks away.

As soon as the door closes I look down at myself, and...oh. There's new layers of strangeness and new questions.

I raise my right hand, and wiggle my fingers.

All five of them.

A crescent-moon of pink scar tissue curves across my hand, from my outer wrist to my index finger. The path the axe had taken.

I raise my left arm next, and sure enough...it doesn't feel broken. It's definitely stiff, and it twinges as I move it, but...

I raise my sheets and look down. There's bandages on my leg. Okay. So, I still have one injury.

But the rest of them have healed.

I suddenly feel very small.

I slump in the bed, curling inwards and clutching at my chest, at the chain that-- the chain that isn't there.

My injuries are gone, and so is my sigil. And so is Kara.

Anxiety closes in like a blanket. It cuts out the air and the light, leaving only confusion. I want a drink. I want to hide. I want to fight, or to cry, or to do something. I don't understand what's happening, and--

The door opens, and.

Oh.

Oh, there she is.

Kara stands there. Her hair's messy, her eyes are bright... and the house of El sigil on a chain around her neck glints in the morning sun.

"Alex!" She rushes forwards, and, oh, okay, I must still be at least a little injured because I struggle to keep track of her and then she's there, hugging me.

She's here, and she looks so beautiful, and she called me _Alex_ , and she's radiant.

She's here. She's okay. I wrap my arms around her. She's okay. _She's okay._

I let out a choked noise against her shoulder.

"Don't you dare ever send me away from you again," she mutters into my neck. It would sound a lot more threatening if it didn't just sound so _sad._

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I had to--I had to protect you."

"Self-sacrificing idiot." she mumbles, and I laugh. I can't help it.

She pulls back from the hug, and wipes her thumbs over my cheeks. It's only when she does that that I realise I've been crying.

"I thought I'd lost you." Her voice cracks as she says it. Her fingers stroke over my cheek and through my hair, and I reach up to tangle the chain on her neck around my fingers. Around the fingers I'd been missing.

"So...about that." I smile up at her. "Can you, uh... explain how you _didn't_ lose me? Because I remember you running over the hill, and then... not much."

Kara's mouth opens into a small 'o' and she nods. "Right. Right. I... suppose you must be confused."

"Just a little." That's an understatement. My arm unbroke.

Kara clears her throat, settling on the edge of the bed. She doesn't stop stroking my hair, though, even as she begins to talk. "Right. So... you sent Streaky running off, and. I kept trying to slow him down, but either he was _really_ scared of the fighting, or else he was really, really determined to get me back to the town. I couldn't slow him down, so I, uh. Jumped off."

She _jumped off a galloping horse?_ I make an affronted noise, my mouth falling open, and she puts her hand over my mouth to shush me.

"Hush. You don't get to tell me off for recklessness right now."

...Okay. I begrudgingly accept that. For now. But we'll be returning to that particular bit of recklessness of hers later. I nod, and she withdraws her hand again.

"So, I just...ran back. I had to get back to you. I didn't have a plan, I was just... angry. Angry and desperate and I needed to keep you safe. I couldn't let you die. I crested the hill, and... my magic was intense. The only _militia_ member left after I was done was their ringleader. And... by the way, J'onn sent a message by this morning saying that the guards captured Maxwell trying to cross the border to Daxam.

"Then you collapsed. And... gods, Alex. You were hurt so badly. I didn't know what to do. I just. Begged and begged for you not to die. I held on to you. I held on to you for a long time. And... at some point, I looked at you, and I saw you'd stopped bleeding. I thought you might've been--I mean, I wasn't sure if you were..." Kara swallows heavily. "But you were okay. I think... I think I healed you."

Kara healed me.

Kara's powers saved my life, and brought me back from the brink.

It's not a surprise, not really - not after seeing what she could do to her enemies. But hearing her say it is still...

It's a lot.

"You healed me?"

"I think so. Mostly. Your leg was, uh. Bad. But. It's got bandages now, so... it'll be okay!" Kara gives a weak, wan smile. "Sorry. But, um. After I made sure you were okay, I carried you until I found Streaky. Then I rode us both back to the Martian village we'd passed - My'ria'h's Hope. I explained everything. Told them who I was, and who you were, and who'd tried to kill us." She lets out a shaky breath. "That was three days ago. They've been keeping us safe here."

I breathe out, slowly.

Kara destroyed everyone that had threatened me. Then healed me, somehow.

I look up at her.

She has the same hair. The same vibrant eyes. The same smile that crinkles at the edges.

The same kindness.

I lean up, and kiss her.

Her lips part in surprise, and her fingers trail through my hair. I shiver, and arch towards her. And...pull back, before I get too distracted.

I feel a little unfocused already, honestly.

"Kara..." I begin, and her eyes widen at the seriousness of my tone. This is something I need to say. I play with the chain around her neck, running my thumb over the El crest. "Years ago, I pledged an oath to serve your family, and you. I've tried my best to keep that oath." I take a breath. "But now I want to make a new oath. An oath to _you._ Just to you.

"You saved my life. You risked your own to save me, and you healed me, after I sent you away. So... my life is yours. In whichever way you want it to be. In whatever way you want me. Ask me to die for you, ask me to _live_ for you, and I will do it. Anything you ask."

Kara's mouth falls open.

She makes a few vaguely speechless noises.

She sniffles and punches me in the arm, hard.

"Ow!"

"Stop making me cry!!" she complains. The complaint would have more weight if she didn't follow it up by hugging me, burrowing her face against my chest.

"I'm sorry."

"Just live for me. Okay? Stay alive, with me."

I lean down and kiss the top of her head. "I think I can do that."

We stay like that in silence, for a little while.

Her fingers trail over the scar tissue on my right hand. My hands stroke over her back, holding her close to me.

She's okay.

We're both okay.

She's here, with me.

"So..." Kara begins, a teasing and seductive lilt to her voice. "...When you said you'd do _anything_ for me..."

I give her a flat look. "I'm not calling the horse Streaky."

"Oh, come on!" Kara makes a shocked, affronted noise. "You swore an oath! It was _romantic!"_

"It _was_ romantic, until you ruined it with your weird horse-based agenda!"

Kara laughs, and kisses me, just because she can.

I take her hands, I hold them close to me, I love her with all of my being...

And I live.


End file.
